7 Telltale Signs You’ve Got a Toddler

Jul 032012
 
 July 3, 2012  Posted by at 14:24 Crash Test Baby, Machiavelli Id's list of lists Tagged with: , , , , ,  No Responses »
7 Telltale Signs You've Got a Toddler

Toddlers affect every single aspect of your existence. Yes, of course having a baby does that anyway, but toddlers are a lot harder to keep up with. Here are 10 ways to recognise that your toddler has taken over your life:

1. You can name every character on In The Night Garden, but you don’t know what day it is.

2. You do know what day it is, but only because the kids’ TV presenters were singing about it.

3. Your most exciting conversation today went along the lines of, “What’s that?” “It’s a shoe.” “What’s that?” “A shoe.” “What’s that?” “Still a shoe.” “What’s THAT?” “That, surprisingly enough, is the same shoe you asked about earlier. It’s a shoe.” “What’s that?”…

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I Wanted a Vibrator, Not an Extra Penis

Mar 032012
 
 March 3, 2012  Posted by at 10:32 Fetish and teh sex, Machiavelli Id's list of lists Tagged with: , , , ,  4 Responses »
I Wanted a Vibrator, Not an Extra Penis

I’ve come to the conclusion that too many vibrators are designed by people who see them as some sort of penis replacement.  Even vibrators meant for external use are often willy-shaped.  This seems fairly daft; there are few vibrating penises in the world, so why apply that model to so many sex toys? Here are my top 6 [because top 5s are so over] other shapes of vibrating sexual implement… 1. The Ring Vibrating cock rings are one of my favourite really simple sex toys – they’re easy to use, they add a bit of extra buzz to the sex you’re

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Unnecessary Redundancy

Jan 262012
 
 January 26, 2012  Posted by at 13:05 Machiavelli Id's list of lists, The Picture of Machiavelli Id, The word of Machiavelli Id Tagged with: , , , , , ,  Comments Off
Unnecessary Redundancy

One of my pet hates is redundant language; I reserve the right to “really truly” for emphasis if I want to, but all that “05-hundred AM in the morning” stuff is for cock jockeys. Here’s a little visual celebration of redundancy in action:

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Mrs Anne X Ample’s favourite websites

Jun 112011
 
 June 11, 2011  Posted by at 22:38 Machiavelli Id goes digital, Machiavelli Id's list of lists Tagged with: , ,  Comments Off
Mrs Anne X Ample's favourite websites

In my Saturday afternoon ennui, I’ve decided to look up URLs that sound like unreal examples. Here’s what I found: www.example.com Like example.org, this has been reserved so that it _can_ be used as an example in documents, presentations etc without leading anyone to a random site. A random site like these: www.example.co.uk Doesn’t seem to exist, but http://example.co.uk does & took me to a Smartways Technology webmail portal that looked cowboy compared to the company’s website. www.anexample.com Don’t go there.  You’ll have to shut your browser down to escape… www.notarealurl.com Exists & is a blog feeding images of reality

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Cybersurvivalism

Jun 102010
 
 June 10, 2010  Posted by at 12:10 Machiavelli Id goes digital, Machiavelli Id's list of lists Tagged with: , ,  1 Response »

The fear of digital attacks and privacy leakages (matron!) drives people to withdraw from online society and hole up in Luddite cybersurvivalist hovels. Or maybe they just whine about it and have another coffee.  Either way, “cybersurvivalism” is a great word and I claim it if nobody else already has. (A quick google reveals that “cybersurvivalist” was used by Brian Hayes in 1998, writing for American Scientist. And the domain cybersurvivalist.com was registered in 1997. Dang.) So here’s my pick of the latest interweb’s-gonna-getcha articles & posts… Aza Raskin’s tab napping proof-of-concept. Some kind of digital Darwinism is weeding out

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Things I’ve learned since mini-MI was born

May 272010
 
 May 27, 2010  Posted by at 20:06 Crash Test Baby, Machiavelli Id's list of lists Tagged with: , , , , ,  1 Response »

It’s been six-and-a-bit weeks since mini-MI’s birth, so here’s some initial observations… Breastfeeding stimulates the baby’s gut. This means you get farted on a lot. Isn’t nature wonderful. At 4 or 5 a.m., breastfeeding may also stimulate the mother’s gut, leading to a “get screamed at or shit yourself?” dilemma. Babies grimace when they have wind, and it looks like a smile. This I already knew. I hadn’t considered, however, that this means they frequently give you a cheery grin while farting on you. Colic is officially defined as something along the lines of “inconsolable crying for at least a

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Caught in the web again

May 242010
 
 May 24, 2010  Posted by at 06:21 Bring on the dancing girls!, Machiavelli Id goes digital, Machiavelli Id's list of lists, The science of Machiavelli Id Tagged with: , , , , , , , , ,  Comments Off

How Many Calories Do You Burn While Tweeting? (Mashable.com) There’s an app for that… 2DGoggles.com: a genius webcomic featuring Charles Babbage and Ada Lovelace. The SciencePhoto.com collection of sciencey images is vast enough for hours of edifying browsing. Who Calls Me – if you get missed calls or messages from unknown organisations, put in the phone number from your caller ID into the search box to find out who uses that number and what experiences other users have had with them. The Rebel Pin-Up Page publishes a new pin-up picture each day with lovely retro-styled ladies on three different networks: Facebook,

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